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Bring on the Night

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Considering a vasectomy?

Sep 18th, 2012 by Peter

This read is the closest I’ve seen to describe what a vasectomy really feels like. Forget the “snip snip” stories about quick painless cuts.

The truth? It’s like a massive slowmotion kick in the groin…. Sorry, but I won’t blow sunshine up your behind.

The story from Craig’s List is almost identical to my own experience, except the passing out part. I didn’t walk like a cowboy afterwards either.

I was lucky to get an early appointment. So 2 weeks after my decision, I had the surgery. That meant going to a hospital 2 hours drive away.

The whole thing felt quite sureal. It was a tiny hospital. I was in a room on the 2nd floor with a view towards a green area. There was no curtains pulled and my… *uhmm*… “points of interest” faced the windows. The nurse and surgeon was both women and the spoke with dialect. It was close to an alien abduction with free probing included.

I drove the car home alone too against the advice of the pamphlet I got a few weeks earlier. Had no one to drive me, so took it as advice more than an order. The trip went without problems, but I still vividly remember how the female surgeon looked me dead in the eye after the surgery and said:

“If you feel the slightest discomfort, you pull over.”

Me: “Uhm ok”
Her: “I mean it!”
Me: “Ok ok”
Her: *Death stare*
Me: “I promise!”

It took me 1 month to completely get rid of the pain. The first 5-6 days were the worst. Even with painkillers. I felt happy that it was done on a Friday, so I had 2 days to recover before work.

I won’t advice for or against it. It’s a personal choice and I’m glad enough about it now. I can’t say anything good about the 30-45 minutes of surgery though.

Tags: Auch, peter

Posted in Denmark, Humour